what can I do

imagine for a moment if someone near and dear to you is suffering with depression. it’s a dark place that does awful thinks. one thing that is likely to happen is indecision. you’ll ask them, “what can a do to help you?” you’ll likely get a shrug or if you are lucky, you will get words like, “i don’t know.”

they are in a state where the mind locks up thoughts tightly and the brain seems to function more slowly. they might recognize a need but they are unable or even afraid to vocalize it. it makes the job of supporting then that much harder and as if it is not hard enough.

 if only a list existed that of things you might do that could help. you could pick a couple to a few things from that list and unbeknownst to them, you would be helping, helping them win their battle with depression.

well, there is such a list and you are looking at it. pick a couple to a handful of suggestions to take on. they really aren’t that hard. don’t expect any cataclysmic events. don’t expect the heavens to open and your friend to be immediately cured. coming out of depression can be a slow process. by sticking to your choices you are reminding your friend that you are there for them, that you care, that they can make it through, that they can get to the other side of depression.

sound exciting? you up to it? ready to choose? then go!

reach out to them.

give them a call.

sit with them.

offer support.

give then an atta boy.

smile at them.

hug them.

fix them a meal.

invite them to do something.

admit that you haven’t always been the best of support.

learn more about their condition.

listen.

acknowledge their presence.

look past your anger and resentment, to be a better support.

look past a friendship that has seemingly drifted.

be more forgiving for phone calls not returned.

be more willing to listen to how they really feel.

look past your own struggles a little more often.

look past your fear and ignorance of the situation.

try to break through the wall that stands between you and them no matter how tall or wide.

be a little less pushy.

try to be more understanding.

reach out more often.

run from their tough spots a little less often.

be a little bit more supportive.

be more willing to hold them when they are in a tough spot.

be a little less critical.

project hope more often.

let them know that they are important to you.

go for a walk with them.

remind them they can make it through.

remind there is another side.

take them to the movies.

get them some chocolate.

get them some flowers.

do anything to make them feel special.

let them know that you love them.

let them know that you are there for them.

let then know that you care.

…and slowly great things can happen.