Category Archives: the boyz

purple berries…

i’m little checked out

i may seem a little checked out right now. to some degree i have.

firstly, i’ve been fighting the idea that i am facing dysthymia, a chronic moderate depression. while far off the lows from my last depression, i am no where near to where i was before. i had smaller depressive variations throughout and for the last few weeks, i’ve been leading the wrong way. that sucks! click to find out more

the path around lake 22

it’s what didn’t happen

i sat on the couch sunday night
feeling fine as i could be
considering the current state of the wold around me
then out of the blue
it felt like i got knocked down four rungs or two

where did that come from
why did that arrive
when it things like that happen
it’s a little less enjoyable trying to survive

i asked the question of where and why
the answer eludes me
i just can’t grasp it
like that damn pesky fly

i pondered since then
and i’ve come up empty
i still look for that person
who bruised my left and right shin

a thought wandered through my mind
perhaps the reason i find myself in a tight bind
remember last week our adventure with jimmy
maybe that’s what caused my life’s small shimmy

events since then had been packed pretty tight
with something going on morning noon or night
sunday night was my first time to breathe
maybe that’s why i felt such a tight squeeze

so do i know a reason for the despicable moment
perhaps something else hides in life’s jellied filled donut
all i want is this feeling to go away
remove this new cloud with plenty of gray

talking to a friend they done tickled my mind
it really led to quite a big find
it wasn’t so much of what happen to jimmy
instead it’s what didn’t happen to jimmy

i lay with him while his breathe did struggled
my emotions only got pulled then tuggled
he look so much like a goner
it cause my heart to harden like a honer

sure it didn’t happen
jimmy’s still with us
no mess no muss
my heart still feels wacked by a rolling pin

sure i see him cross from here
but i can’t seem to shake the feeling of not having him there

the path from here is certain
this i must do
keep looking in all trade show booth
in search of the pesky ole fountain of youth

red barn

what is it about fear?

the other day i wrote a post frightened. it did not register even a read. maybe it was because i forget to stick in my more tag, so people could read the whole post in email, or in the archive. maybe it was wordpress’s less than solid reader counter system. maybe people had real fear about frightened so they stayed away. Continue reading

clouds and sunlight

the boyz christmas

Mary & i do not have children. that doesn’t mean that the day isn’t eagerly awaited by the boyz. the excitement start to build as soon as the presents start to come out. here’s a picture of our tree before present opening.


wait, where’s the presents under the tree? they are here, there on top of the entertainment center.

that’s a strange place, you may say. let me explain.

every year, their auntie sends them gifts. one year. we already placed the dog gifts up from previous dog gift experiences. one year, we thought we’d let them open their gifts. how cute.  after a couple of years we came home with some of auntie’s gifts to us, open. ah, the presents were guilty by association as they shipped with dog treats. more presents moved to the top of the entertainment center.

all seemed quiet for a couple of years. then…we came home to non-associated presents ripped open. what? the association with dog treats didn’t exists. we figured our boyz had been introduced to a drug, had it taken away and had to find a source. they were hooked. they needed their fix in whatever way they could. hence, all presents now live on top of the entertainment center.

that’s not to say the christmas is a bore. they still get to open their presents.

   
they will also wait in eagar anticipation as we  open our presents.

they even help open our gifts.


why? the love shread paper down to the size of a deck of cards. their work isn’t done until then.

here’s a video of the aftermath.

you may say, but i see some big pieces of paper in that video. yea, they have acquired a decerning taste. some paper just doesn’t pass muster. they know good paper from bad paper, or put another way, god drugs from bad drugs.

i close with my wish for you, a christmas full of gift not done up in ribbons and bows, gifts to big to hold, not a thing except in your heart.