reds yellows oranges
blues greys all meld together
in one brillant sky
harken back to my friend’s 40th birthday.. my friend’s mom made some snide uneducated comment about me being on my ipad.
tonight, she pushed the envelope yet again. we went to our friend’s as her daughters had a dance recital today. my friend”s mom is retired enough that she can come over for events like this.
i don’t care about what you think about me, but i do care how you treat me.
a friend of mine shared this mantra with me. with the sound of Aretha franklin echoing in my head, i thought about the saying, i realized the i do care how you treat me part represents a statement of respect and/or compassion. secondly, I realized how most people with social anxiety, at least at some level, struggle with respect.
i am fascinated with the research of kelly mcgonical, that people who use stress as an indicator live longer and I can only assume better lives. heck, who wouldn’t mind if stress had a slightly looser grasp on their life? You can put me in that category.
since i’ve heard about her work, i have been trying to use the stress as an indicator model. my first attempt worked swimmingly and since then, i have met with a more limited success.
when’s the last time, someone has try to talk you out of a pick-me-up emotion? you know, “oh, you’re happy. what can i do to help?”, your excited? we can’t have that.”, “you’re upbeat. how can I fix that?” but that’s what happens to bring-me-down emotions. something not only seems incongruous, it also seems wrong.
no wonder so many people choose to run from their bring-me-down emotions. actions condition us that they are bad or wrong, that they need to be fixed.
newsflash! bring-me-down emotions don’t need to be fixed any more than pick-me-up emotions.
people who have been with me long enough will remember my run-in with my sister.she got upset when i suggested some ways she could help me while countering yet another suggestion for mindfulness. I have nothing against mindfulness, but i offered up other options that I thought would be more helpful and had been working to lift my mood. after brooding over it for a couple of weeks, i ran head-on to the thought of acceptance. almost immediately I got over the butt-headed response she gave.
in talking to a couple different friends recently, I’ve come to this revelation. the revelation is:
the best path out of depression is self-care.