in our last episode…i talked about the best i’ve felt in year sthanks to methylfolate. one thing i didn’t mention was a fear that i had that it might stop working. shortly after a move to the positive direction. guess what? my worst fears have been realized, a turn-hard right. Continue reading
this a quick rundown on last week’s post. the basics are people who have the mthfr, like me, don’t process enough folic acid. folic acid partly breaks down into methylfolate which is a building block for many neurotransmitters. these neurotransmitters help the cells in the brain communicate. there is pretty good scientific evidence that a shortage of neurotransmitters partly contributes to depression. click here to see by last post and explore this more in depth. read on for the good news
a few years back, i had a genetic test done. one thing it showed i had the mthfr mutation. that’s not completely surprising since about one in three people have that mutation. if you add some appropriate vowels and consonants in appropriate places, you’ll see what i think of this mutation.
there otta be a law… that antidepressants can not to be able to cause depressive symptoms. ineffective, okay; depressive, not so much.
let’s see, now we need to come up with a fair and equatable penalty. I got it! make the ceo of the company take a depression inducing drug for a matter of five years. then, they’d know what it feels like, as they can’t get out of bed for yet another day. that would teach them a lesson.
the sunday support group I attend ends on an up note where everyone gets the opportunity to find something good going on in their life. i said tomorrow was my birthday. I said that with utmost sincerity since i really felt joy about celebrating my birthday. this would be the first one in three years that i hadn’t found myself in a living hell. I went to bed with those same feelings. Continue reading
i replied to shrew’s posts on the dishing out of shame.
it dawned on me, the quickest way to eliminate shame; make it a requirement that everyone take two quarters of mental disorder. they would have to take living with a mental disorder 101, and 102, if they still didn’t get it, they could successively take living with a mental disorder 201. if still didn’t work, they could move on to the. upper division courses, living with a mental disorder 301 and 401. if they haven’t got it my then, they are a lost cause and probably committed.
the synopsis would include, but not limited to:
- staying in bed and getting out just in time for significant other to come home, doing virtually nothing
- sleepless nights
- isolation (the intensity of this would increase as one progressed through the coursework, eventually excluding your family, best of friends and significant others)
- weekly trips to therapist
- monthly trips to the psychiatrist
- monthly trips to the pharmacist to pick up new drugs because
the last script didn’t work
- heaps of self-doubt
- heaps of feeling like something is wrong with oneself
- despair (the lack of hope would increase as the coursework continued)
thoughts of taking one’s own live
- potentially trying to take one’s own life (definitely, upper division course work)
- thoughts that the one’s own value is less than the dump of crap one did this morning
- at best, weekly showers
- making poor decisions about what’s best for oneself (intensity would increase with coursework)
- a chemical imbalance in the brain
- a serving of unresolved anger (this would become more prominent as coursework continued)
- the pressures from the outside world that says, “get over it.”
- the pressures from inside of oneself that maybe we’re (the royal we, mind you) are making this all up
- heaps of judgement and disapproval. (this would increase as coursework continued)
- hearing voices when nobody is around
- having those voices tell one to do irrational things ( upper division coursework )
- seeing things that aren’t there
- paranoia (increasing as continuing through the coursework)
- thoughts that everyone is working against oneself
- thoughts of “no one gets it.”
- a weeklong trip to the local psych ward (upper division coursework)
if you “got it”, you could take a test to show your knowledge in that particular area and potentially move to the next class. then again, maybe one would have to take the class again, in order to simulate the idea of cycles.
maybe that would be enough that ignorant people and society as a whole would pull their f*cking heads out of their ass and stop it with all this stigma-y (there i go again, making up words) bulls*hit.