a chance to see what the world would be like without you

what if you could be like george bailey
a chance to see what the world would be like without you
have to ever been tempted
tempted by magic or witchcraft to find out
to find how the world would change without you?

for george
the town’s a wreck
the town’s name has been changed to not protect the guilty
a druggist a town bum
the friends he came to rely on…changed or gone
his wife how an old maid
a brother lost as a child in an icy pool
a transport of soldiers destroyed
many soldiers die

clarence the angel speaks his worlds of wisdom

each man touches so many other lives

george’s saving grace…zuzu’s petals
finally one up the crotchety mrs. potter
sam wainwright not such a pita after all…more of a savior
long live the bailey savings and loan
a gorgeous wife
three loving kid
one who plays a mean piano one with petals another who spells as well as i

a toast to my big brother, george
the richest man in town

what would clarence show to you?what lives have you touched?

the quarter you lent to the man to fill a meter
though running late the woman you let pass in the crosswalk
your best friend from elementary
your biggest nemesis from elementary
your high school math teacher with mutual bouts of torture
your mother – your father
your true love
i’m sure the list is endless
maybe you are the richest man or woman in town

what did clarence say to turn you around?

here’s to getting to feeling better

i hate were i’m at. this depressive cycle sucks! sucks, i tell ya. sucks! it really does.

i guess i should be thankful i’m not suicidal. why the hell not. this is the worst i’ve ever felt. my thoughts today went to leaving my life behind, all of it. finding a nice comfortable bridge to live under.  now i understand why so many people with mental disorders end up on the street. somehow in my sick mind, that would make everything all better. sick i tell ya, sick.

i guess i’m thankful that i’m not suicidal. for that reason i know i’m not completely filled with despair. the despair needle has to point to something less than 100%.

what’s in the other part of the tank? the opposite of despair, HOPE. There’s got to be some hope there. that’s gotta be the reason i’m hanging on.

right now i feel a little like george in it’s a wonderful life,

“help me clarence. get me back. get me back, i don’t care what happens to me. get me back to my wife and kids. help me clarence, please. please, i want to live again. i want to live again! i want to live again. please God, let me live again.”