i actually had a good day

i actually had a good day. i can’t remember the last time i could say that.

perhaps it’s the self care i performed. after my annual physical, i went for a 3 hour, 6 mile walk at paradise valley, with the boyz.

lookin’ cute at the table

i  experience great solitude there. i ran into less than 10 people while on my walk.  it gave me great peace.

here is a picture from my walk.

huckleberry blooms at paradise valley

 after that, i came home and made saw dust. that’s one way of saying woodworking. if you’d see my garage, you’d understand. I made good progress on my project, but still have a great hurdle to overcome; my wood is not retaining the stain. that would be a deal breaker since i am trying to match an existing stain. i have great hope that i will over come this problem.

the day doesn’t sound like much, i know. the most important thing is i didn’t spend the day stuck in the pit of despair.

could it be my increase of dose in medication? I am currently titrating with lamictal. that’s just a fancy way of saying building the dosage to what is considered a therapeutic dose. I’m half way to that. i’m really hoping the medicine kicked in. my family has a history of being sensitive to meds, so perhaps??

some people cycle from depression to mania in hours. as my psychiatrist said, sometimes they don’t know what state of mind they’ll be in by dinner. my cycles run in months. my depressions last 4-6 months. ugh!!

i feel promise with this rapid change. my only hope is there isn’t an equally awful crash tomorrow of the next day.